I have never before experienced such a bizarre combination of emotions. It’s not even like I’m swinging from one to the other, they’re all there mixed up in a swarming, swirling mass.
I am feeling very excited that it is nearly time to meet Sprocket on the outside, we have spent so much time and energy dreaming about this and it is an incredible feeling to be so close. At the same time I am well aware (well as much as we can be) that things are going to change. I am nervous, anxious and more than a little scared. At the same time I am happy, confident, peaceful and know that we have it in us to do this well. But it is such a huge responsibility and I think I am a little in awe of it right now. I know the next 7 weeks are going to fly past, goodness knows I’m going to be busy enough at work, my boss has set me a list of must do’s that have to be done before April as he knows my energies are going to be at home more than work after the birth. At the same time I want this time to slow down and enjoy just being the two of us, well the five of us including the furry kids. Their lives are going to change so much too – we’ve fairly well trained the dog to keep out of the nursery, even when we’re hanging out in there she lies in the doorway (looking sad but still). The cats are another story though, Zoom has just figured out that the cot looks like a great place to sleep and if she jumps on the dresser she’s in so we may have to put our baby gate up in the doorway. We used this in the kitchen when Tai was a puppy to keep her contained and the cats were convinced the couldn’t jump it if they tried so hopefully they won’t try this time either.
Lately I’ve been enjoying having ‘conversations’ with Sprockie too. I’ve talked to the belly since the transfer, told many stories and even sung a song or two and have been loving feeling all the kicks and wriggles over the last 10 weeks or so. Last night I leant over and gave it a kiss and was rewarded with a big kick that made K’s whole belly move. So I did it again with the same result. It happened three times in a row by which time we were laughing so hard it was hard to see if it was a kick or laughter making the movement! The movement has slowed down a bit in the last few weeks but K is still getting plenty of solid kicks and punches to let us know things are good and “I’m fine thanks Mums”.
We had a long week this week, K was unwell last weekend feeling a bit congested and yucky, so she went to Mr CMM for some ‘erbs only to find that her blood pressure was high to match the pretty impressive swelling in her feet and then legs. We had a midwife appointment set for the next day already so we just had to wait for that but in the meantime things were pretty stressful and Dr Google does not help. We know this already but yet it’s the first place we find ourselves when something starts to go wrong. So of course we started worrying about bedrest, the lack of money coming in if on bedrest, what does this mean for our home birth plans.. worrying over worrying because of course that’s not good for high bp.
Sadly our midwife is overseas this month so this check up was with a different one who was…interesting. I’ll just say that we thought our midwife was pretty crunchy but this one was all crunch! A little crunch is great, but when you’re trying to work out when you should be worried and at what point would they recommend bedrest the answer ‘well it’s your body so no one can tell you what to do’ doesn’t help. If there was a ‘but’ there (no one can tell you what to do *but*) that would be fine, but there wasn’t – that was the end of the statement, umm not helpful! K’s bp was still on the high side but had come down from the night before, and Sprockie was moving around with a great heart rate, so we were saved a trip to the hospital for testing. We monitored it for a couple of days, as well as protein dipstick checks and a liver function blood test, and it’s come down a bit again, as has the swelling. When we saw the mw on Friday evening again she was very happy with it but let’s just say we’ll be glad when our mw gets back in town because her being very happy with it didn’t quite match what she told us on Tuesday night. But our mw is back on the 28th and we have an appointment on the 1st thank goodness.
In other, more exciting news we went to a nappy workshop on Friday night* which was fantastic – went through all the options for reusable nappies; pocket, fitted, all in one, pre-fold etc and the differences between them. I am still slightly confused but way less confused than I was before, at least now we understand the pros and cons of each type. We came home with a couple of samples and we’ve decided to buy a couple of each type and different brands to try and then get serious after we see what fits Sprockie best.
*yes I’m aware how odd it is that I think spending Friday night talking about nappies is exciting – go us party animals!
This weekend we haven’t been doing too much, we both finished work early on Friday and took Tai to the river for her first proper swim for a long time. Yesterday we finally picked up our stroller, which we ordered a few months ago. We are very happy with it, but can I just say that despite having a cot, bassinet, clothes, nursery all set up and ready to go that seeing the stroller sitting in our lounge was the thing that really freaked me out? It is cool though, we did a lot of research into it and got a really good deal (although this is K’s parents present to us) – it’s a bit of a milestone in a way because we’ve been waiting for it for so long. K’s feeling a bit fluey and yucky again so we haven’t been doing too much. For some reason we got up really early today, right now I’m sitting on one couch with a hiccuping dog lying over me and K is napping on the other one.
Now I’m getting sleepy too…