Hope: The Necessary Evil

AKA BFN#12.

Yep, that’s right – sometimes no symptoms just means that there is nothing to be symptomatic of.

This cycle was different to others, but at the end of the day the same result. K did feel a little crampy last night and more this morning so we were half expecting a negative but it still aches.

I lay awake last night trying to get upset and therefore over it but until we tested I just couldn’t kill the hope. It was a hard wait this morning to get the result, we distracted ourselves nicely with some shopping and watching K’s school first IV playing rugby but we were pretty anxious.

But I guess it’s over with now, that chapter is closed and we’re on to IVF. It has really come down to that.

Toot toot indeed.

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About Tui

30-something kiwi-lesbian-stay at home-Mama, raising our toddler son with my wife, two cats and one dog.
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17 Responses to Hope: The Necessary Evil

  1. babyblizz says:

    Good Luck to you both. We just decided to start on our journey.

  2. Next in line says:

    Oh girls I am so sorry about the BFN. That really bites. I remember hitting the last cycle before biting the IVF bullet. I am holding onto hope for and really believe that you will little ankle biters in your home.

  3. vee says:

    Ah shit, well that wasn’t supposd to happen. I saved your blog for last this morning, expecting happy news. So sorry. I hope IVF is the magic bullet for you that it was for us. I remember it being scary, standing at the brink of it, but it wasn’t nearly as bad as I anticipated. Good luck.

  4. Jen says:

    Crap. I had lots of hope as well. Stay positive in the next chapter and you will get your BFP!

  5. A. says:

    Well, that just SUCKS. I know there is a BFP in your future….and soon. xoxo

  6. Gayby Rabies says:

    Shit, I’m so sorry. Welcome to the IVF train. I saved you a seat.

  7. Pufferfish says:

    Well crap. You have A LOT of company on this IVF train. There seem to be a ton of bloggers joining you on this trip right about now. I wish you didn’t have to get on it, but I do hope it works for you.

  8. strawberry says:

    Dammit. i’m so sorry to hear this. I am hopeful that IVF will do the trick though.

  9. I’m gutted for you two. Dammit.

    I’m glad that Hope paid a big long visit, though, because you need practice feeling Hopeful during your successful IVF cycle.

    I’ll be cheering for you throughout.

  10. mingomama says:

    Ugh. I’m so sorry.

    Love and hugs and kisses

  11. S. says:

    shit, im sorry. good riddance to the iuis ~ may ivf bring you speedy success!

  12. queerstork says:

    i’m so sorry. this is so unfair. i’m shedding some tears up in canada for you right now.

  13. luckylittle13 says:

    [long string of expletives] I’m so sorry. IVF is not as big and bad and scary as I thought it was a month ago when we got our last IUI BFN (AKA our last BFN ever). It has actually brought a new hope and confidence that we haven’t known in all the years of ttc. I wish the same for you girls. I’m sending you lots of love in the meantime.

  14. Boo says:

    Damn. I’m so sorry. Here’s hoping that’s the last BFN you ever get. I can’t wait to hear all about your IVF process (and of course about the BFP at the end).

  15. Olive says:

    Ugh, I’m so sorry for the bfn. I know how it is to still hang onto that shred of hope in spite of evidence it’s might be over. So hard.

    I have so much hope for your next chapter though. Go IVF!

  16. Suze says:

    I’m so sorry for the BFN, but now it’s just time for another step 🙂 It’s all a journey, and I wish you the best of luck!

  17. poppycat says:

    Oh Fudge! IVF, here you come!!!

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