6 months of trying

It’s now 6dpo and it seems to me like this first part of the tww has gone fast – I guess because we’ve both been sick pretty much since then I haven’t been thinking too much about it. Kind of crazy to think we’ll do our first test the day after tomorrow hehe a shot of excitement went through me when I wrote that! It might be too early to tell for sure though so trying not to fixate on that day.

It hit me as well that it’s 6 months since we first started trying. After all the months (years really) of planning and build up that went into it, and all the pressures, frustrations, hopes and tears that we’ve been through, it’s hard to believe that it has actually been 6 whole months. At times it has seemed like time has gone so incredibly slowly, and that so much of this year has been characterized by waiting, and counting days so its hard to believe that all of a sudden it’s halfway through this year and 6 months (a pretty good chunk of time) has already gone.

And although we haven’t had our happy ending yet, we’re still here loving each other and doing everything we can to make it happen.

I’m also conscious that there’s a lot of negative thoughts and feelings that inevitably make their way here, but there’s also  a lot of good stuff that’s happened to/with us so far this year.

And in that vein, the new header picture is one that I took at the beach a couple of weeks ago when we went out there for my birthday.

Although it looks black and white, believe it or not, that picture is actually in colour.  About halfway there, it started raining and looked pretty miserable so we nearly turned around, but I was determined to spend my birthday at the beach so we kept going. I actually tend to prefer the beach in winter – especially the west coast beaches with black sand that and big surf that just gets so wild in the winter weather – it is so freeing and soothing, so soul pacifying for me. Raglan is like that and reminds of the beaches where I grew up. The ones where my Mum would take me to walk in silence when I was being a typical moody teenager – they never fail to make me breathe deeply and remember the good things in life.

Having said that, we were taking the dog with us for her first visit to the beach so spending 40 minutes with a wet dog in the car on the way back home didn’t appeal all that much. Luckily for us,  the rain cleared almost instantly and we ended up having a beautiful day and the beach almost to ourselves:

I’m sure there’s some kind of mangled metaphor in there about it being darkest before the dawn etc etc, but really it’s just a reminder to myself that we are having plenty of good times as a family, even if our family isn’t as big right now as we’d like.


About Tui

30-something kiwi-lesbian-stay at home-Mama, raising our toddler son with my wife, two cats and one dog.
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2 Responses to 6 months of trying

  1. Travelher says:

    That is a gorgeous beach! You are so lucky to have something this beautiful within driving distance. I can’t think of a better way to walk and breathe and clear the head. We have beaches, but not empty like that!

  2. Great header shot!!! Glad you had an awesome day; it looks beautiful. Wishing you lots of good luck. Blogland has their fingers crossed for you guys. xo

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